Another good day

I'm back ... really back!

That's right. It was another good, OP day for me — the third in a row. I had a great lunch (grilled shrimp and veggies over whole wheat couscous for 7 Points), a Frapuccino light & 100-calorie pack of cookies as an afternoon snack, and some cheese before dinner.

Dinner was some whole wheat pasta with spaghetti sauce and a veggie Italian sausage link and a serving of sherbet was in order after dinner. My evening snack (one of Roni's banana oatmeal cups) put me at 26 Points (one more than the 25 I'm now allowed).

I also took a 20-minute walk. I know, I should be getting 60 minutes of exercise ... but I'll have to build up to that. I'm out of shape after taking so much time off. The walk I finished was exhausting enough.

I'm still not happy about being back in the 200s. In fact, I'm rather ticked off. But like I said earlier, it's my own damn fault.

I was watching an episode of Dr. Phil today, the second of two focusing on "the Ultimate Fat Debate." Among the panelists were Kelly Osbourne (who has apparently lost 42 pounds), Jillian Michaels and some trainer wearing a "No Chubbies" T-shirt who kept saying that fat people were that way by choice — they chose not to exercise and to eat poorly.

Naturally, the fat people on the panel took offense. I took offense. But there's some truth to his message. There are a lot of choices to be made — and until very recently, I've been making all the wrong ones.

I've been doing what's easy instead of what's right. It's easy to grab a drive-thru dinner and sit on my butt. It's right to cook my own meals (even if it takes away from my writing time) and get some exercise (ditto).

Being fat doesn't make me a bad person, and there's no moral imperative for me to lose weight. I won't automatically be happier because I'm thin. However, I will be healthier ... and healthy and happy often go hand in hand.

It'll be more fun to shop for clothes, too. ;)

I need to take Jillian's advice and start pushing myself out of my comfort zone. A 20-minute walk is better than nothing, but a 30-minute walk would be even better.

Crappy day all around

I started my morning by finishing my state taxes. Turns out that I entered a wrong number in TurboTax, and instead of getting $4 back, I owe $91. I don't have $91 lying around. Both my checking accounts are below $5, and even though payday is Friday, I have to put aside at least $350 of my check for the oral surgeon I'm seeing on Monday (and another $100 for my car license plate).

So the morning started out badly. It only got worse when I decided to face the metal beast.

That's right: I finally got on the scale after avoiding it for a month. It wasn't pretty. I weighed in at 209.6.

Yep. I'm on the wrong side of One-derland again. I'm not sure how I feel about that. Wait. That's not true. I'm unhappy. I'm angry. And I know I have no one to blame but myself. (OK. I can also heap a little blame on the Boyfriend. I don't know if he thinks he's helping me exercise willpower by tempting me with foods I shouldn't have or what.)

But he's not around 24/7. I have to take 100 percent ownership of a lot of the bad choices I've been making. The raspberry-coconut Zingers from the gas station, cookies from the vending machine at work, Cheesecake Factory double chocolate cheesecake while I'm writing in the Barnes & Noble cafe and fast-food burgers and fries are all on me.

I've been avoiding my food journal. I've turned back into a couch potato. I haven't been planning my meals. I've been relying on the drive-thru instead of taking time to cook healthy, tasty meals for myself. I've been indulging in too many treats way too often.

All these bad habits have to stop. I know what to do — and even if I don't have the money to attend WW meetings right now, I have to buckle down and Just Do It. (Yep. So far the year of Just Do It has been a big bust. I'm turning that around. Now.)

Lost month

Has it really been almost a month since I last blogged?

You know what that means — I've been a bad, bad girl. A month of not counting Points (and eating everything in sight) has surely taken a toll ... but I'm afraid to get on the scale to see just how much of one. I've never had a meltdown of such major proportions.

Yesterday, I had my first on-plan day in I don't know how long. I gave myself 25 Points and ate 25 Points. No more, no less.

It really wasn't that hard, either. So why have I been eating like a fiend for so long? I can't explain it.

I suppose I've just been lazy. I've been writing (finished another manuscript) and haven't wanted to spend time in the kitchen. The fact that I haven't had money to attend WW meetings is also a factor. And of course, time with the Boyfriend doesn't help any.

Now, I'm shooting for two days in a row. So far, so good: Had an egg on a Bagel Thin with a slice of RF American cheese and tomato for a total of 4 Points.

Four down, 21 to go!

Best-laid plans

Work got in the way of my healthy dinner plan tonight.

I decided not to do the Crock Pot BBQ because I wanted beef stroganoff (a lightened-up version of one of my fave low-carb recipes). I took the beef out of the freezer and left for work.

However, by the time I got a chance to take my dinner break, it was an hour later than I normally go … and we were close enough to finishing for the night that it didn’t make much sense for me to leave.

That’s when the wheels fell off my wagon: I munched on popcorn and Goldfish crackers. (At least I didn’t hit the vending machine, eh?)

And when I got off work at 11 p.m., I didn’t do what I should have, which was head home and cook dinner for myself.

Nope. I ended up at the Wendy’s drive-thru instead. More proof that old habits die hard.

Well, it was still a more successful day than the one before. It’s a start!

Long, cold winter

I know, it's just an excuse — but this damn cold weather has been making it tough for me to stay OP.

I haven't been exercising. It's tough to walk with 3-foot-high snow piles still covering the sidewalks, and every time it starts to melt, we get more.

The weather is also making me not want to cook. I'm stuck in an "I don't care" kind of mood, where eating out — be it fast food or something else — just sounds easier. As a result, I haven't been planning ... and consistently eating more than I should.

Well, it has to stop. I know, I've said that before — then promptly let myself get derailed again. Getting to a meeting will help. Friday is payday, and I intend to set aside the money to go that following Monday.

Until then, I'll be back to taking things one day — one choice — at a time. Today's start? The first thing I ate when I got up this morning was a 100-calorie pack of Emerald Natural almonds. I love snacking on almonds.

Next up, finding something healthy for lunch and putting dinner in the Crock Pot. HG BBQ Pulled Chicken, here I come!

Out of practice

Yoga isn't all that easy to do when you haven't done it in a good long time and you're trying to fight off a curious dog.

I succeeded, though. Got in a 20-minute yoga workout. Other than that, my activity level was in the toilet. Either I need to buy a new pedometer or I've reverted to couch potato days. The pedometer only logged a little more than 1,500 steps — for the entire day.

Ugh. :P

At least I stayed OP on the food front. I've eaten 26 1/2 total Points today. I may add 1 or 2 for a snack ... or maybe not. I'm not all that hungry at the moment.

Gasp! Did those words just come out of my mouth?

Goal for Tuesday: Beat today's step total. It shouldn't be hard.

Ask and you shall receive

Just last night, I was lamenting the fact that my week was activity-free and I vowed to earn at least a few Activity Points this week.

This morning, Tina over at Carrots N Cake served up her 2010 Yoga Challenge.

I love yoga whenever I bother to do it. In fact, every time I make it to a class, I think to myself, "What took you so long?" So of course I jumped right on Tina's challenge bandwagon.

Yep, that's me: Comment # 41. I said I wanted to make yoga a regular part of my life this month — at least three times a week.

To get me started, I borrowed a Web site from one of the comments above me, yogadownload.com. I was worried it'd be expensive, but all the 20-minute classes are free. I'm going to download one and get started just as soon as I finish this post.

Perhaps exercise will help me budge the scale faster.

Yes, this morning's encounter with the scale was a bit disappointing. I know I shouldn't complain, having dropped from 198 to 193.2. That's down 4.8 pounds!

However, last Friday the scale was at 190.8 ... so 193.2 is a disappointment, especially after an in-control weekend.

Oh well. I refuse to let it keep me down. I lost 4.8 pounds in my first OP week in I don't know how long. That's a fantastic result! :D

I plan to keep up the great work this week. This morning started with a glass of almond milk and Hungry Girl's Egg Mug Classic (2 Points) topped with a little salsa.

For lunch, I'm thinkin' enchiladas. I made them again Sunday, and this time I was able to eat them. They were delicious ... and I still have beans and sauce to use up, so I can make another batch. Think I'll enjoy a salad with them this time, though.